U.S. Outsources Obesity To India

Supersizing Rampant in Bangalore

The United States is rapidly outsourcing obesity to India and hopes to shed as many as three trillion pounds of unsightly cellulite annually, President George W. Bush announced today.

In a speech to the U.S. Chamber of Commerce in Milwaukee, the President said that since most of the millions of jobs outsourced since he was elected President were extremely sedentary, “Those jobs are now making the people of India fat instead of us.”

“In the long run, the weight loss more than makes up for the job loss,” the President added.

In India, where U.S. companies have outsourced customer service jobs at a blistering pace in the last three years, workers confirmed that they have never been fatter in their lives.

“Before I got this job, I used to get out of my chair occasionally, but those days are long gone,” said Sisirkana Bhatia, 27, who works at a Verizon call center in Bangalore. “The minute I’m off work I head on over to the Olive Garden for their all-you-can-eat bread sticks.”

A co-worker, Palak Mehndi, 25, agreed: “Next to ‘how can I help you,’ the words that I’m saying the most often these days are ‘Supersize me!’”

Indeed, Indian President A.P.J. Abdul Kalam recently said in a nationally televised address that India was “in the throes of a Supersizing epidemic, adding that “the time has come for the Indian people to decide whether or not they want to look like Dick Cheney.”

Elsewhere, in a new poll released today, both President Bush and Senator John Kerry were defeated by the University of Connecticut.

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Amit Bahree

This blog is my personal blog and while it does reflect my experiences in my professional life, this is just my thoughts. Most of the entries are technical though sometimes they can vary from the wacky to even political – however that is quite rare. Quite often, I have been asked what’s up with the “gibberish” and the funny title of the blog? Some people even going the extra step to say that, this is a virus that infected their system (ahem) well. [:D] It actually is quite simple, and if you have still not figured out then check out this link – whats in a name?

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